Waiter, there's an elephant in my soup!

The "ridiculous spectacle" of our "first black President" heaping accolades on an Exalted Cyclops of the Ku Klux Klan at Democrat Robert Byrd's funeral last week was just too much. And Obama's tribute to Byrd was pretty comical, as well. Really, the only thing that could have made it more entertaining would have been to have the entire funeral cast perform in black face.
As I watched in bemusement, it occurred to me that Democrats have the wrong mascot. It's certainly difficult to make the case that an ass isn't perfect, both literally and figuratively, but just think for a moment. You go into your favorite restaurant and, over on one side of the room stands a gargantuan elephant. He's swaying back and forth, blowing air thru his trunk, smashing stuff, and just stinking the place up in general. Then, out of the kitchen comes your waiter to greet you, and ask for your order. When you mention the elephant, his reply is "what elephant?".

Well, that's the way this is... except if you're a Democrat, you don't mention the elephant. If you're a Democrat, you don't mention that you're guy has been a racist while pandering to West Virginian voters...because it was never about racism anyway.

If you're a Democrat, you don't mention that the general Obama chose to run his war in Afghanistan, and who was just confirmed with a 100% Senate vote, is the same guy you ridiculed as "General Betrayus" a couple of years ago when he was Bush's choice...because it was never about his competency.

If you're a Democrat, you don't mention the thousands who died needlessly from AIDS because of your politically correct posture that prevented the Surgeon General from identifying and quarantining the infected...because it was never about concern for AIDS victims.

If you're a Democrat, you don't mention that the federal government has no intentions of stopping the invasion of our country while you file lawsuits against the states who try to secure their own borders. You don't mention that these illegal invaders have destroyed our health care system, our education system and our social safety nets...because it was never about concern for immigrants.

If you're a Democrat, you don't mention that the same Europe that you claimed we should be emulating is drowning in a debt of ever increasing pubic entitlements that you say we need here...because it never was about a better way to do things.

And, if you're a Democrat, you don't mention that the real cause of the greatest environmental disaster of all times is the result of preventing the free market from providing the energy that we must have from much more sensible sources than from miles below the ocean floor...because, it never was about the environment.

No, if you're a Democrat, you don't even mention it when the elephant eats all of the food and then passes the byproduct back onto the floor because, it never was about any of the ridiculous antigravity, anti-common sense notions that you claim to profess. Because, its all about turf, baby.

"But what would Republicans do if we gave Dems the Elephant mascot?", you ask. Well, they could have the ass, because that's what they deserve for letting it all happen. And I think the tea bag is already taken.